I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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