I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Randomize
