I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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