Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
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