Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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