In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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