real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
