She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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