i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
