Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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