So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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