she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Randomize
