she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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