Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
he thought i was a dude.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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