hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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