Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
