Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
