Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
