turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
