yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
