I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
