I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
