Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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