i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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