I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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