he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
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