i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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