If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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