Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
