Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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