Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
