I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
either way he was missing a nipple.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
