Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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