There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
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yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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