The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
