Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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