im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
