How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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