I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
