my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
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