party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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