32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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