I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
