He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
