ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize