$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
