Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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