Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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