Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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