i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
