We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
