dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
